2 years ago….I left Deloitte, my grandmother died, divorce filings were being prepared….and I decided to start my own consulting gig.
I was unhappy, unfulfilled and not sure what was next…but I knew I needed to do something different.
It’s been 2 years that I’ve been doing this Entrepreneur thing.
I’ve loved it. I’ve hated it.
I’ve cried. I’ve laughed.
I’ve had plenty of money and I’ve had barely enough to fill my car with gas. I’ve survived on Cheerios and Cheezits when there just wasn’t enough money to make ends meet and the savings account was depleted.
I ripped the Band-Aid off and I went for it…and was literally broke.
There was a period of time where I needed to drop a client because it no longer worked for me or my boys. I was insanely busy and it was getting me no where…it only added stress and kept me from reaching my ultimate goals. Add in being a single parent…running here and there…and everywhere…it was time to make a hard decision. 6 months in to this entrepreneur thing was killing me.
So, I dropped them. I walked away from the client.
Took the risk that another client would soon increase my project load…and that somehow, it would all even out…the money would be there.
It was risky.
The money wasn’t there.
Not from client work anyway.
I had to humble myself and ask for help…and I’m so grateful for those who knocked on my door…knew I was struggling…and offered to help me out until my client work picked up. What a blessing to have people who know you so well and are so willing to provide whatever is needed…quietly and with love…and with no conditions. A powerful experience for me…one that I am forever grateful. It was a tough 5 months…but I fought through it…with the support and encouragement of family and friends…and my boys who stood by my side every moment…cheering me on…so very proud of their mom.
So, yes…risks don’t always pay off.
But sometimes, they do…and you just have to hold on tight and keep riding that roller coaster…because eventually you get the hang of it…and your screams of terror turn to screams of excitement. You learn where some of the twists and turns are…and you’re better prepared to handle the challenges…even if your tank is on “E”….you figure it out and eventually, have more wins than you can count…more blessings than you thought were possible.
I’ve traveled all over the world. Met amazing people. Experienced many challenges and many successes.
Most of all, I’ve been able to be home with my children and experience them, more fully and build a bond that is greater than I could have imagined.
I’ve built amazing relationships and made connections that have brought me through the worst of times and celebrated with me, the best of times. I’m so grateful for you…my family and friends. Without your support, encouragement, checking in…I would not be where I am today.
Funny thing is…even with the long, sleepless nights spent working, early mornings, anxiety and never knowing what will happen next…well, I’m happier than I’ve ever been. I’m enjoying every minute…the WINS keep me UP while the LOSSES teach me more about myself and challenge me to be a better fighter…and a better negotiator.
Going in to this 3rd year…it’s proving to be more fruitful and amazing than I could have ever imagined. It doesn’t mean the hard times are over and it’s all roses and rainbows forever…it just means I have to bring my own sunshine…my own will…my own fight…and keep making it happen…day after day after day.
Change is in the air…and I’m excited about what lies ahead…